Conversations…

6 May

Recently, I was reminded of a conversation had by myself and some girlfriends over a lunch a few years ago. It was the most random topic ever…Perdue chicken. I mean, who really converses about Perdue chicken (and is NOT a card-carrying member of PETA . . . exactly.)? Anyhoo, this conversation was one of the BEST conversations I’ve had in my life, not because it opened my eyes to the giant world-domineering food industry, not because I became aware of animal injustice, but because it made me laugh! Not just laugh, but laugh till it hurt; I’m talking–lack of oxygen to the brain, jaw dislocation, abdominal pain, bladder spasm, and the inevitable hiccups that ensue, type of laugh. They are the best, and yet so hard to come by. Figures, anything that’s worth anything, is always hard to come by. But how is it that the ‘art’ of conversation seems like it will be hanging in an infrequently visited museum in a city near you? I can almost see it clearly: ‘Conversation’ framed in heavy brass, hanging on a wall, unguarded (hopefully), people standing, staring at it, trying to uncover its ‘true’ meaning…not realizing that they, themselves, are the artists who forgot how to paint! Conversations, to me, are like colorful threads! Some of those threads are heavy-duty, high-test, and durable. Others are delicate, fragile, only meant for intricate detail. Then some are your everyday, casual, run-of-the-mill type threads…the ones used to sew a button back on a shirt, keep a patch in place, or hold an emergency hem up. As I’m traveling through this life, all of these threads are making up one heck of a tapestry. Some areas of my tapestry are made with darker, somber threads, some spots are bright and vivid, highlights, indeed! Other areas are low-key and unassuming, but still, my tapestry wouldn’t be complete without them. As for those tiny, delicate threads–they are imperative right where they are. I try not to take any conversation (thread) for granted. Whether it be a conversation with my husband about the car’s oil change, or a demented patient telling me about the butterfly on his arm, or my seven year old explaining the reason why baths aren’t that important…I’m trying to soak it up, trying to appreciate their handiwork in my tapestry, my life’s artwork. It IS hard sometimes, especially after a long day at work, when my mind is at full capacity and can’t hold anymore, still, I try. Even as I type this blog, I stop to listen to my son discuss his need of Thor’s hammer, and I try to remind him his superpower comes from his smile . . .threads. As I told my friend, I will tell you as well: When I am breathing my last breaths on this side of Eternity, there are some conversations, that I’m sure, will be part of my last Earthly thoughts. Life certainly is made up of moments…which become memories. If you truly think about it, though, conversations can take up just a moment, or even two;) it all depends on what you put into it. If you want a good conversation, one that will be woven into your life, be sure to do your part in creating it. NOTE: Not all conversations are happy, witty, or inspiring…some conversations just have to be had, be sure to use the heavy-duty thread for those…but I hope, more often than not, you find yourself laughing, laughing with every fiber of your being…laughing till it hurts!

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Lessons Learned…

27 Apr

A little while back, I started a Facebook Status series where I post the lessons I’ve learned over the span of a week. I try to limit it to about three or four ‘valuable’ life lessons. I’ve gotten a lot of positive feedback on this series, in fact some people have mentioned that it’s something they look forward to reading. I appreciate hearing that because, as much as I think I’m a voiceless profile pic at the end of the day, my lessons make people smile, laugh, think, even cry (not in that specific order). There are lessons to learn every day–some are blatant, some are subtle, some are simple, some are complex, but they ARE there! This week I have been reminded about the the tenacity of the human heart. As a Nurse on a Cardiac Unit, I am constantly reminded of the intricacies of this muscle. It beats relentlessly. I don’t know about you, but there’s nothing I can do ‘relentlessly’. Granted, the heart gets fatigued, it gets sick, diseased, and deformed but it tries–relentlessly–to keep beating. It is an amazing masterpiece that was engineered to work for a lifetime. A lifetime. Everyone has their own perception of what a ‘lifetime’ should be. For myself, I feel a lifetime should be somewhere in the vicinity of roughly around 86 to 95 years…give or take a year or two. However, a lesson I’ve learned is that a lifetime is exactly what it says it is…a life time. Everyone’s is different. I painfully learned this when my father died at the age of 54. FIFTY FOUR. Hardly a lifetime in my eyes, but his lifetime nonetheless. I was able to hear my first son’s heart beat when he was around nine weeks gestation in my belly…little did I know that his heart would stop beating at 40 weeks…sadly, this was his lifetime. Our lifetimes are unique to us and we need to try to keep that in mind as we carelessly “wish this day would end already”. If you sit quietly and still enough, you can hear your own heart beat. Don’t take it for granted. Know that a perfect synchronization of events needs to occur to achieve one single, solitary beat. Each beat is necessary for us to continue talking, moving, working, texting, and face booking; each beat is also crucial for caring, hugging, laughing, and loving. As I see people with tired hearts, sick hearts, even broken hearts, the lesson learned: Our
life is indeed timed, and the next beat isn’t promised. I had mentioned earlier that there’s nothing I can do ‘relentlessly’…I strike that! I can relentlessly love my husband and children, I can relentlessly forgive, forget, and move on, and I can relentlessly thank the Creator of the miracle housed in my chest for not only another day, but for another beat. Today makes 14 years since my Dad died. I believe my Dad knew his ‘lifetime’ was coming to an end, his heart was putting forth its last efforts (relentlessly). Although I wasn’t there when his heart made its last beat and he took his last breath, I know that his love for me didn’t die with him, I still feel it. Love is relentless, perhaps that why the heart and love are synonymous…but that’s a lesson for another day.

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Here We Go!

22 Apr

Well, here we go! I’ve been persuaded to try this thing called ‘blogging’ for some time, but have been leery about doing so. From having read several blogs, one is really putting their thoughts out there. This may suit some people fine, and 99% of those people are accustomed to speaking their mind, being assertive, opinionated, passionate, blah, blah, blah…I am none of those things. I roll with the flow, ride with the tide, keep a low profile…you know…play it safe. Don’t get me wrong, I have, on occasion, spoken my mind on topics-usually, only to be steamrolled into going with the consensus. I have also tried my hand at assertiveness, which usually ends in my crying uncontrollably, and, once again, conceding to the ‘higher power’. As far as being opinionated and passionate, I am those things–and with great fervor, I might add…usually in my shower, long AFTER the debate. ( I must say, some of my most gripping, compelling speeches have been given to an audience of soap scraps, loofahs, and half-empty bottles of conditioner [for Dry/Damaged Hair, of course]). I’ve been told that this is an excellent way to let your family, friends, and the world know EXACTLY what’s going on in your mind. The thought that anyone would actually care what goes on in this mass of gray-matter in my head amuses me! Who am I?! Why would you care? Honestly, this is my problem most of the time. I truly think that people truly don’t care about my thoughts. Perhaps they don’t. Then again, if your reading this then you took some interest in what I have to not only say, but what I think. A lot goes on in this mind of mine. I wish I could say its all humorous banter, but I cannot. I think that’s what might keep some people interested, and what might cause some to look away…and that’s okay. I plan to blog about life in general, which includes, but is not limited to: my spirituality, marriage, children, work–Nursing particularly, my relationships, and interactions with society as a whole. I’m sure I’ll color outside of the lines on more than one occasion, but what fun it is to cross that line sometimes! I hope you visit me here frequently…it’s gonna be quite the ride for all of us, so…HERE WE GO. . .

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Hello world!

6 Aug

Welcome to WordPress.com. After you read this, you should delete and write your own post, with a new title above. Or hit Add New on the left (of the admin dashboard) to start a fresh post.

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